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Saturday, April 17, 2010

Loneliness of my soul............................

A man is known by the company he keeps they say. If it is so, then everyone is bound to have their baggage of loneliness with them as companions. Loneliness is not something that doesn't exist at all but it is something that is always there no matter who you are. Every human being feels lonely in his life at some point or the other and I guess I’m going through it right now. In my entire life I haven’t felt so lonely, but its natural to have such feelings, because that's what distinguishes us and makes us human and that is why we are as we are. If we shed some light on why we feel aloof or lonely at times, we would be very much astonished or even probably surprised by the results. We ourselves are responsible for our self-defined gloominess. This is because at times we really feel that we are uncared for or feel someone doesn't understand us. But in my case I feel that sometimes I over analyze real life situations as I’m a little more analytical then average and have this growing sense of self pity inside me. This feeling always gives me thoughts which gives me the feeling of receiving the wrong end of the stick in life always no matter what I do. The truth might not always be true if I touch my heart and see deeply into the matter. Its just that my expectations in life and from people around me or circumstances that I face, have got the better of me.
I just thought about it and got to the conclusion that  expectation is the silent killer which murders millions of mushy and time tested relationships. If there would have been no expectations from anyone, the world would have been a much better place to be. If there would have been no expectations, not many people would have had an aching heart and a life long grouse against anyone they relate to or more precisely someone they love or care about. If it wouldn't have been for unreasonable expectations not many relationships would have been spoiled and their wouldn’t have been any grievances. And I realized that when you give something, don't expect anything in return. When our mother gave birth to us, she never expected that we will give birth to her. She just fulfilled her desire to raise a family and live for them. In the same way, let our actions make us live for our self and let not expectation screw up the major portion of our lives. Let us have the freedom and will power to express our love, affection and eagerness for people whenever we feel. Let us not restrict our freedom of expression just because he or she is not responding the way we want them to.

All in all I realized that a little bit of loneliness is good for self analysis to keep a check over our actions. Introspection always make you communicate with the inner self. But too much of introspection can make you scale the altitude of self pity whose decent would be hard to cope up as I’m finding it right now.